A House in Progress

I love road trips.  Most people who know me know this about me.  It's a little bug that I think I inherited from my Auntie Mary.  I took a few road trips to Wisconsin throughout the past year to visit a friend, and on the way to her house is the town of Columbus where an old house is being refurbished.



The first time I saw it, I knew I needed to take a picture of it because it rang so loudly in my soul that this house is a metaphor of the Christian life.  This house is run-down and should probably be torn down.  It may have even been condemned by the city; who knows?  It is old, it has definitely seen better days, and it is ready to retire.  But someone thought it was worth saving and has chosen to refurbish this house from inside out, from top to bottom.  The house is not only getting a paint job, but the old paint is being scraped off.  The house is not only getting new doors, but the old ones are getting torn away.  The structure of the house is being left as is - anyone who knew the house twenty years ago would say it is the same house - but the house is getting a second chance.  The house is not doing this to itself, but someone is doing it for the house and to the house.

I am this house.

From God's perspective, I was in need of refurbishment.  He saw me in that state and knew me.  He has known me since I was born.  I was this house - in desparate need of refurbishment.  When I asked Him to be a part of my life, the project began.  He had a creative vision for me on the inside and the outside, and He began that work in me.  He wanted to scrape away the old and repaint me with the new (the house is white...also a fabulous metaphor).

Where I have been misguided in my thinking at times is when I think that the refurbishment project is a short process or one that has been completed. 

I just went through there again this week, and the house continues to be in progress. 

Just like me.

Beavertail Lighthouse

In March, Beth and I went to Rhode Island to celebrate my Nana's 85th birthday.  It was a great event.

We went to Beavertail Lighthouse in Jamestown, Rhode Island. 

 This place would be one reason to live in Rhode Island. That, my Nana, and some great relatives. But the place has been a great place for me.

My parents divorced when I was two and a half.  My biological father's side of the family lived in Rhode Island, and my Nana and Grandpa made sure that my brother and I made it out to be with them all each summer.  They all were generous with time and funding great trips. When we were too young to fly on our own, my Nana and Grandpa would fly to North Dakota and pick us up.  That's love.

Once we were old enough (age 8 or so for me) to fly on our own, Marc (my younger brother) and I flew from  Minneapolis to Boston as a direct flight.  This was back in the day when people could mill around airports and wait for others at the gate.  As we got older, we started flying from North Dakota and changing planes until we landed in Providence, Rhode Island, near where my grandparents live.  These flights and travels definitely prepared me for a travelling mindset that has followed me throughout my life.

My father has five siblings, and I am the oldest of fourteen cousins (yes - I am #1).  My cousins remember waiting with great anticipation for our visit because the two-three weeks were filled with fun - trips to the beach, Plymouth Rock in Massachusetts, Rocky Point Amusement Park (which is now demolished...it's probably a mall), and so much more.  I can't say that I have a favorite "event" because each one has its unique attributes.

I have great memories with my Auntie Mary who would get us (my brother and me) up before dawn to drive about half an hour to Beavertail Lighthouse.  It is one of her favorite spots, and most my cousins would say that this a favorite memory that they have with her.  We would watch the sunrise and then get breakfast.  There is a place called "Stacy's" - I honestly don't remember if we ate there or not.  Sometimes, we would pack some food and stay on the rocks into the afternoon after catching some sleep in the car.  Many of the rocks have been flattened by the ocean, and they provide a great spot to put a lawn chair and read a book.  We would have to move as the tide changed, but it was worth it.

There is truly nowhere else like this place in the rest of the world.  It is a great place to think, breath, and relax.  A good book is a good companion, but it is not necessary as the place itself is companion enough.  I never tired of watching the tide come in or go out, the waves crash against the rocks, or breathing in the salt-filled air.

And I long for Beavertail...

June 13

Seven years ago, my mom passed away on June 13.  It was a Friday.  Some years, the day has passed without too much difficulty.  This was not that kind of year.

It started when I saw the bulletin for this morning's church service.

"Great is Thy Faithfulness"

"It is Well"

"Blessed Be the Name"

Nice.  So - I cried through pretty much the entire church service.  It is almost ten at night, and my eyes are still sore.

My daughter Beth knew what was going on, and she has been great all day.  We had lunch together.  She encouraged me to get my schoolwork done.  And my friend Jen and her daughters came to hang out with us.  We played DDR and did a little Zumba.  Beth even finished off the day with painting my toenails.

The day is almost over, and another year has passed.  Great is His faithfulness.

From the Balcony

Jacob's Well is a monthly worship service on the second Saturday of every month.  It is slightly different than a typical Sunday morning service with different elements every month.  Some months the band is complete with bass, acoustic, and electric guitars as well as drums and piano.  Some months there has been a violin or an additional electric keyboard.

Tonight we are having a more accoustic feel, and I am honored to be joining Todd who runs sound in the balcony so that I can run the word slide show. 

I can't remember when this service started at our church, but I have never been sad that I have attended. There have been some Saturdays that I have just wanted to stay home and sleep because the week had been long or the day had been filled with cleaning.  There have been Saturdays that I just didn't feel like praising God.  I know - that is horrible to admint, but it is the truth.  Most of the time when these feelings are there, I leave the house hoping just to make it through the night without falling asleep.

But I am always glad that I go.  Some nights I have literally laid on the pew and just listened for the first few songs.  Some nights I have closed my eyes and asked God to make the night go by quickly.  Some nights I have told God that I don't expect Him to meet me there.

But He always meets me there.  Let me say that again - He always, always, always has met me there.  I have found that, although He would love for us to be excited to meet with Him, God does not care how we feel.  He wants our action.  Scripture speaks to this in many places.  We are to worship - an action - God ... no matter what our feelings are, how we feel physically, or how our week has been.  God cares that we are tired, but He desires us to worship Him.

Most Saturday nights that I start out laying on the pew feeling sorry for myself, I have found that I cannot stay in that position for long.  As others around me have been worshipping the Lord through word, song, and deed, I have been pulled into worship along with them.  I have found myself on my feet, my hands in the air, and voice singing along with others.

When the night closes and the lights go up, my heart sinks that is is over. 

But is over?  Is our "time of worship" restricted to the time when we are led in song, Scripture readings, and prayer?  Is it restricted to a church building? 

What restricts me from worshipping God in word and deed all day long ... all the days of my life?

Perspective - A Graduation Speech

I graduated from high school in 1992. That was 18 years ago and is the birth year of many of our graduates who are now 18. Microsoft had just released Works – not Word – Works, and the first nicotine patch was introduced to help stop smoking. Popular films that year were Aladdin, The Bodyguard, and Wayne’s World. Television programs that were popular were Law & Order, The Oprah Winfrey Show, and The Simpsons. I guess some things don’t change. Other things have changed – a gallon of gas was only a $1.05. I remember that because I went on a cross-country road trip to Rhode Island to visit relatives.


I remember two things from my graduation day: I sat next to Mark Murdock – the star football player who I doubt knew my name. And a speech by my friend Meghan who talked about the Dr. Seuss book – Oh, the Places you will go. I have about five minutes to share something that I hope you will remember.

Looking back to 18 years ago, I know some things now that I didn’t know then. I thought I knew a lot, but I was wrong. I thought that my dreams and my success were the most important things in life. I wanted a lot of things, and I thought that it was all about me making them come true.

These graduates have a lot of hopes and dreams as well. They want to go to college, they want cars, homes, financial stability, jobs that they love. Graduates, you think you know a lot. And you do; I know many of you – and you do know a lot. But if you think that you are the only key to your own success, you are wrong.

What I’ve learned in the last 18 years is that the key to success is not in what you know but in who you know and how you treat them. My friends and family have cheered me on to every success that I have set out to accomplish. Without them, I would not be here today as the person that I am. My friends and family have taught me that the keys to success are kindness, patience, and self-control.

If you want to be successful, be kind to others. Treat them not as yourself but better than yourself. You need your friends, your family, and even the person at the Holiday store who takes your money. Smile more; complain less. Life from the perspective of kindness to others as well as yourself looks better. I have surrounded myself with role models and have allowed others in my life who are toxic or who pull me down to take a very minor role in my life. Surround yourself with others who believe in you, who give you good advice, and who cheer you on in kindness.

Have patience as well as self-control. Success comes in small packages. Each time you are faced with a decision, make the right good decision. Our small decisions determine our long term path. My husband has said that a person who murders another person usually does not wake up one day intending to murder. No criminal becomes a criminal overnight. Small decisions, poor decisions, or unguided decisions create the criminal. In the same way, the success that you want comes only after you have made a series of good decisions, and that requires patience. This is hard in our instant society. You can cook Ramen noodles in under three minutes, text your friends super fast, and receive your McDonald’s meal in three minutes or less from ordering to your mouth. Success requires us to wait for things and exhibit self-control. Buying that iPod today puts us that much farther from the car that we want tomorrow. Instant gratification is what we expect now, but success requires patience and self-control. Set goals and work towards them.

The people in my life over the past 18 yrs have been the kind of people that I want to be like, and I hope that I have made them proud because of the influence that they have had on me. When I look back on the past 18 yrs, I see growth in who I am, and I feel successful today because of what I see in those years. Our theme at Wolf Creek this year was “Any dream will do…”… As you look forward in your life – in the next 5 years, 10 years, 18 years…what dream will do for you? When you are 36 years old, what will you have to share with the graduating class that year? What dreams will have been accomplished? And what perspective will you have to share with them? When you wake up tomorrow morning, a graduate – class of 2010, what dream will you pursue?

In closing, dream those dreams. And remember that there are a bunch of women at Wolf Creek who are here to continue to dream with you, to support you as you move forward, and who hope to hear about those dreams that have been accomplished. Congratulations to each of you!

Good Smells at a Softball Game

Every Thursday night, the men of our church play softball, and their friends, families, and BABIES come to watch them play.  Nothing smells quite as good as a young baby.  Tonight there were three babies under the age of 3 months in attendance, and each one smelled delicious.  Absolutely delicious.

I found out after the game that our men won (actually 10 run ruled the other team), but I was too busy talking, holding babies, and smelling babies to keep up with the actual game.  I do have my priorities.

Cherish the Cabin...

Seven years ago, Kerry and I bought a house with lake access "up nort" (as they say here in Minne-sooooooooooooo-ta).  It's a great place to go, dontcha know.

At the time, it seemed like a good idea.  My huz is a pastor *gasp*, and we are blessed with a home in Minneapolis that is owned by our church.  We love our home; however, we also know that it is wise to own property.  Therefore, we purchased this cute little thing and have been blessed by it ever since.  We rent it out (or try to) for the winter months to college students at Central Lakes Community College (Brainerd), we use it as much as we can in the summer months.  This year, Kerry is on sabbatical (a leave from his church to study, refresh, write, and sleep), so the cabin will be his refuge.  Although it has air conditioning, it does not have internet access. 

Memorial Day weekend was beautiful, and we had a lot of fun there.  We laughed (ask my kids about Saturday night!), played games, and were on the water a lot.  Siah is an absolute rock star on a tube, and Kerry had to work very hard to dump that kid into the water.  Beth is fun to watch, rather listen to, while she is on the tube as well.  She prefers a fast but uneventful ride.  I just love to be the spotter (the older lady in the boat who watches for when the kid(s) falls off of the tube.  But more than the fun we had, I honestly cannot think of a better way to spend time than listening to the sound of waves, loons, bugs, trees, wind, and nothing.  Truly, we have been blessed, and I am so grateful that this place will be a refuge for my husband's mind this summer.  I even get a little alone time up there;  however, I am so tempted to fill it with others...

I realize that not everyone has a cabin, and I do not take what we have for granted (especially when I write the check every month!).  But there are ways for us all to get away from all of this great technology and to find a spot that reminds us that we are more than just autotrons, connected to our phones, our computers, and our cars. 

I heard a commercial on my drive this morning.  I laughed at first, but then I thought, "What a clever commercial!"  It talked about the state parks of Minnesota, the great woods, the rivers, the lakes, and the bike trails.  We have so many opportunities in Minnesota - some right around the corner or even hidden in the depths of our cities - and that makes us so fortunate!

Don't worry - I'm not becoming a huge hiker, tenter, etc.  I still need running water and prefer air conditioning.  But...a little more time outside, a little more time disconnected from the technology that I love, and a little more space in which God can speak - that is what I intend to seek out this summer.  The side benefits (hopefully):  a great tan, a few pounds lost, and some time gaining input from God about where He plans to lead me and my family.